ABOUT MON

I worked for over 20 years in the fast-paced and high-pressured world of finance, both as a journalist covering the industry and for financial services companies.

When my last full-time role ended in redundancy, I felt a mixture of shame, like I had failed, and relief, because I really didn't want to be there.

I knew it wasn't me. I knew that the job was unrealistically demanding, that it took too much from me, that it didn't allow me time or energy for anything else in life.

I could see the signs in my body - I was tired, run down, too thin, I kept getting sties on my eye. To make myself feel better I spent money – retail therapy! – and numbed myself with alcohol and weed.

But I couldn’t shake the feeling there was a part of me that was ignored and blocked.

Going freelance allowed me to build a more balanced life, but still something was missing. I felt a lack of purpose. I knew that there must be something more - something more that I could give, and in giving, receive as well. I started therapy. I felt a bit silly at times, spending all that time navel-gazing. The midlife crisis is often viewed humorously, with men getting red sports cars and women plastic surgery (and both new, younger partners). That I was going through this during the pandemic, which was a time of upheaval and reflection for many people, made the experience even more intense. But as I explored, I realised that I was on the right path, that there was something more and it was worth pursuing.

I spent six months in my native California, living with my oldest friend and spending my days connecting with nature - feeling the power of the ocean and the ancient wisdom of the redwoods, feeling small in a good way, feeling a part of something much bigger than me. During this time, I started exploring with psychedelics and quickly recognised their truly transformative power. I connected with my dreams and realised how much they could teach me about myself. I became fascinated with using altered states of consciousness as a means of self-discovery, growth and healing.

I decided that I wanted to work in a therapeutic capacity. I started training to become a psychotherapist, which begins with a very intense self-examination, working in a group, which is a very different dynamic to one-on-one therapy. You realise how you project onto other people and how you see yourself through their eyes. Through that process I learned a lot about myself and I realised that it was time – after 45 years of always doing things “the right way” – for me to go my own way.

Since then, I have created my own curriculum – many short courses, retreats and a lot of self-study – to train myself to be the counsellor and guide that I want to be. To figure out what I have to give and how I can help others. The retreats and personal sessions I now offer are a fusion of that varied learning and my own life experience – Jungian psychology, plant medicine, dreamwork, guided meditation, connecting with nature, with sexuality, with creativity.